This Was Their Life
by Carnivalgirl
Summary: DH spoilers! A different, more positive fate after the war for Remus, Tonks and Teddy, with a little angst, a little romance and, of course, a little family. Alternative ending to 'To Love And Be Loved' but should work equally well on its own. AU. RLNT.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** I told you that you hadn't heard the last of me! This is an alternative ending to my longer fic 'To Love and Be Loved', which told the story of Remus and Tonks through DH, but should work on its own as well. There are two parts to it that can be read seperately or together... I only wish this were canon. Enjoy!

**This Was Their Life**

Teddy would not drink his formula. No matter how many soothing sounds his grandmother made, or how much she rocked him, he refused it. She hoped he wasn't frightened by the absence of his mother. She was frightened enough herself. She didn't want him to have to convert to formula; he refused to drink it, it was probably horrible, and it would be no replacement for the warm body and kind voice the small baby was no doubt missing. Andromeda didn't want to cry, but it was impossible. It was getting very late, or at least it felt like it was. Teddy was getting so hungry. The time was dragging, something just had to happen. If Nymphadora and/or Remus were coming back, then let them come now. If an Order member was coming to tell her they had died though the war was won, let them come now. She couldn't stand the waiting. The only thing worse than waiting was the thought that if they had lost, these agonising minutes would be the last moments of her grandson's life. They wouldn't spare a half-werewolf.

She wondered why she was surprised when there was a knock at the door. She hesitated to answer it at first; though she wanted to know, she was not sure how she would handle the knowledge. However, she was a brave woman, and she took a deep breath, held the screaming baby in the crook of her arm and headed towards the door. Her entire body going tense, her breaths short, she opened it.

At first she didn't believe it. It was unreal. But there they were; Remus and Nymphadora, both in one piece, illuminated by the light pouring from the house. They both looked terrible apart from the smiles that lit up their faces and eyes. Their voices were quiet and strained.

"Mum...it's finished. Harry...flipping...killed Voldemort. He's dead."

"And we're alive." Remus added, unnecessarily. "We've made it."

"Oh, Merlin." Andromeda replied, and burst into tears. Her daughter and son-in-law looked slightly tearful too. Nymphadora gulped and asked for the baby, and her mother handed him to her. She gave him a firm kiss on the forehead and held him against her, scrunching up her face tearfully as he was. His cries softened a little as his little hands gripped her cotton robes. Remus put a hand over his mouth emotionally. Andromeda stepped back to allow them to come in, and they walked in steadily, as if in a dream.

"Tea?" she asked, slightly giddy with joy and disbelief.

"Yes, please." Her daughter and son-in-law replied wearily. She went to the kitchen, and, seeing herself reflected in the glass cupboard door, smiled and gave a little squeak of joy. The sound of laughter bubbled from the living room. Everything seemed right.

When Andromeda returned to the living room, Nymphadora was already nursing a quiet Teddy, and Remus was slumped on the sofa beside them, barely able to keep his eyes open. She gave him his tea and asked him a selection of the thousands of questions she had.

"Do you know what happened to my sisters? Just...out of interest."

"Narcissa, Lucius and Draco are all alive, although Merlin knows what's going to happen to them all. Bellatrix is dead. Don't be offended when I saw I'm very glad about that."

"Mm-hmm." Dora agreed, her eyes fixed on her satisfied baby.

Andromeda responded with no remorse. "Who killed her?"

"Molly." Remus said. "Mrs Weasley, henceforth known by all but her closest confidantes as 'The Dragon'." He was a little too tired and emotional to talk more about the war, but his mother-in-law was supremely satisfied. They had years, after all, to discuss these things.

Tonks and Remus were a little reluctant to put Teddy to bed that evening, even though they knew now that they were only saying goodbye to him for a few hours. He wasn't being a good boy tonight and would probably keep them awake, but that was no problem. They sang a quiet song to him and watched him close his big amber eyes and sleep softly under his rotating mobile. With whispered goodnights, they left the room with their arms around each other. Silently, Remus sat on the bed and crawled over to the bedside table to get the letter he had written for Teddy, and was not surprised to see another letter clipped to it of better quality paper and in a different, scruffier handwriting. He gave his wife a look of deep tenderness as he handed it to her.

"I thought my actions deserved a separate explanation." she said, her voice still very quiet and humble.

He smiled, then, with a nod towards her, counted; "On three...one...two...three!"

They tore up their letters with relish. They didn't need to say a permanent goodbye to Teddy. They didn't need to give him a last message. Remus laughed to himself as he sent the pieces into oblivion with his wand, but immediately froze when he saw that his wife was breaking down in tears.

He quickly crossed the bed towards her, and she pressed herself against him, sobbing into his robes.

"I thought...I thought I'd never see him again..."

"So did I." her husband told her, stroking her soft brown hair.

"I shouldn't have left him, I could have died, I should have listened to you, it was a terrible thing to do, I'm an appalling mother. I'm s-s-sorry!"

He hugged her more tightly and planted a kiss on her forehead. "The only thing that upsets me is the thought that I would have had to live without you if you died. Otherwise, Dora, your heart was in the right place. You loved Teddy, you were prepared to die for him, is that a sign of a bad mother? But Dora...the war is past. We have time. Lots of time."

She stepped away from his embrace and looked up at him mournfully. "I know." she gasped. "I'm so glad...I can't believe we're alive, I _literally_ _can't _believe it..." He nodded. "...but so many people are dead, Remus, it's so horrible, it's not good at all but it is good and I just, I just don't know how to _feel_..."

Remus didn't know how to feel either. He recalled the darker days of his life, when he had considered his life to be a continuing stream of pain and loss. This had never been more significant than when Lily and James had died, because everyone was so glad the war was over and it seemed to him that no one was mourning...Recognising his own, twice-experienced feelings in her, he took her hands, and lent forwards and gently kissed her.

"It's alright..." he said, his own voice cracking. "I know how you feel, I know how it seems like just can't be over...but it really is over and this...Dora...this is our life, this is what it's all lead up to, this is what all our suffering has been for..._you_ and _me_ and _Teddy_..." They embraced again, both crying now, both dazed and emotional with relief, fatigue and despair. They climbed into bed and lay in each others' arms, kissing and whispering their feelings to each other until they were too tired to do so, yet they could not sleep. Teddy's cries to be fed and changed came in a few hours and the hour hand of the clock began a new circle, and they both felt calmer then. This was the new reality. This was their life.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** I've broken up the two parts into two chapters now, just to ease the weight on the mind! Hope you enjoy this!

**Five years and several weeks later**

It was five o'clock in the evening, but the sun was still beating down on the family as they made their way back to their bed and breakfast. They had been lucky to find one that was on the very sea front, making their walks home after the day's activities consistently scenic. The tide was out and it was very quiet; the only sounds that could be heard were the waves, the seagulls, their footsteps and the wheels of the pushchair. And, of course, the gentle snores of Olivia, who had grown tired during the afternoon shopping trip and was now asleep on her father's comfortable shoulder.

"Do you want to put her in here?" Tonks asked Remus quietly, gesturing the pushchair.

"No, she's fine." he replied, but gently handed her Olivia's stuffed dog, Padfoot, who was precariously dangling from her chubby hand by his plush black tail.

Teddy, in contrast, was full of energy and was skipping ahead excitedly. The balloon tied to his wrist, which he had bought with the money Granny gave him for the holiday, moved back and forth with him. Everyone had a treat; Teddy had his balloon (which happened to be a Luminous Balloon from the Blackpool branch of Weasley's Wizard Wheezes), Olivia had a new dress (bright pink, her favourite colour) and their parents each had a simple ice cream (both chocolate), and nothing else. It was Remus and Dora's fifth wedding anniversary and they intended to celebrate it as fully as possible tonight.

"What time did you book the restaurant?" Dora asked Remus.

"Seven-thirty." he replied, glancing at his watch. "Should give plenty of time. They'll be needing a bath after this morning."

She laughed. "Yes, the babysitters will be coming at seven fifteen. They said we could stay out as long as we liked, no charge."

"Wonderful." he said with a grin, and she beamed back at him only for Teddy to come between them, reaching for both their hands.

"Let's do that thing." he said. Of course, though people like Harry always got confused, Teddy's parents knew exactly what he meant by 'that thing'. Remus put Olivia in the pushchair while Dora and Teddy checked the pavement to see if anyone was around. When they saw that the (quite literal) coast was clear, Teddy took his father's hand in his left and his mother's in his right and they swung him. All three of them laughed joyfully, without a care. After their arms got tired and they realised they had taken up the pavement for a little too long, they walked back to the B'n'B together in relaxed holiday happiness.

The B'n'B was a wizard's holiday haven which stood inconspicuously on the seafront as an abandoned café. Though it was busy this time of year, they had booked a perfect room; large and simply furnished; the main room consisted of a double bed that took up most of it, and there was a small bathroom to the right and a bedroom containing a single bed and a cot to the left. Dora scooped Teddy up in her arms and took him to the bathroom, while Remus woke Olivia and took up a picture book to read to her.

Teddy and his sister had gotten quite grubby through the day, as they had a tendency to. His mother placed him in the bath, which contained only hot water...for the moment. With the old saying in mind, she asked him; "Are you ready?"

He nodded his turquoise head enthusiastically.

"_Ebullius._" With a flick of her wand, a mountain of white, yellow and pink bubbles surfaced from the still water. Teddy squealed excitedly as they rose to his height, hiding him in their midst.

Yes, Dora thought to herself, _the Muggles give perfect water, but only a wizard can do perfect bubbles_. Teddy was now concealed behind the foam, giggling quietly, and she looked in mock panic around the room, trying not to laugh herself.

"Oh, WHERE is TEDDY? Oh, WHERE did my little boy GO? Did he go down the plughole? OH!"

"I'm HERE!" he shouted, parting the bubbles with a sweep of his arms, spreading them all over the room and on her. He grinned and splashed, and she laughed, scooping up the small mound of bubbles that had landed on her leg and blowing them into his smiling face.

After some minutes of splashing and playing, the little boy's face grew gloomy. Tonks leant towards him and asked him what the matter was.

"Why can't me and Livvy come with you and Daddy tonight?"

She smiled sympathetically and touched his wet cheek. "Well, Teddy, this time five years ago your daddy and I got married, and we want to celebrate that together. Now, you've been to a wedding and you know how soppy they are, and Daddy and I...well, we're probably going to be quite soppy tonight. We might even _kiss_." He pulled a face. "I know, but that's what you do when you're in love. So we thought, well, Teddy and Livvy won't want to hang around with us when we're acting like that. So we invited Harry and Ginny to come and look after you. You like playing with them, don't you?"

He nodded, smiling a little. "But it'll be boring staying here."

"We'll be back in the morning, don't you worry. And we'll have lots of fun all together tomorrow, that's a promise." He still looked a little unsure, so she said; "I'm worried your little sister will be upset about me and Daddy going away tonight, even though we're not going for long. She's only little, after all. Will you be a good big brother and take care of her tonight?"

Of course, Harry and Ginny would take perfectly good care of Olivia without Teddy's assistance, but he loved being her brave, good big brother and protector and was always excited by the opportunity to show this. He nodded enthusiastically, and she grinned and prepared to wash his hair.

Harry and Ginny arrived with perfect timing, and the children were delighted to see them. Teddy, after hugging Harry, immediately ran to his room and grabbed as many toys as he could to throw on the bed, while Olivia introduced her babysitters to Padfoot and did a twirl for them in her dress. Remus talked with them while Tonks tried out different hairstyles in the full length mirror.

"Five years, eh?" Harry said, brightly.

"Yes." Remus replied. "And we owe them to you."

"Don't say that." the younger man responded quickly. "You could've worked it out without me."

"Imagine...if we hadn't stayed married, we wouldn't have had the children, and where would we be without them?" Remus delighted in watching Harry's modest embarrassment at his achievements. Perhaps he was exaggerating, but sometimes he really felt he did owe Harry his happiness.

"Well," Ginny said, blushing. "You're making it up to us with the opportunity to practise being parents."

Tonks turned from the mirror and gasped comically. "Ginny?"

Harry cleared his throat. "We're just in the, hrmm, planning stage."

Knowing the couple probably didn't want to be questioned further, but feeling happy for them, Tonks asked everyone what they thought of her hair. She had experimented several times but chosen, with the automatic agreement of everyone, her usual pink. It was less bright than it had used to be, more reddish, but it went well with her white dress. Taking hands, Mr and Mrs Lupin prepared to leave, giving the children hugs and kisses.

"Are you sure you don't want to be paid?" Remus asked Harry, who was currently helping Teddy set up his Triwizard Tournament playset. He shook his head vigourously, and with a quick beam at Tonks Remus put his hand on the doorknob, only to feel a weight on his leg. Olivia was stood beside him, clinging to the fabric, and there were tears pouring down from her dark blue eyes.

"Daddy?" she said, her little voice wavering forlornly. She was used to her mummy leaving because she went to work every day, and she was used to her daddy going out, but both going together? It was a horrible thought for the toddler, and her little face crumpled in despair.

Feeling his heart melt for her, Remus bent and picked her up, holding her close. "Oh, Olivia, don't cry! Mummy and I will be back in the morning, we really will. Come on, you'll make Ginny sad if you're sad." Ginny sniffled and sighed emphatically, but Olivia ignored this and continued to cry.

"Daddy kiss." she asked, quietly, and he hugged her tightly and kissed her wet cheek firmly, making sure to give her a big, assuring smile.

Taking a quiet breath, the little girl turned her head to her mother, and added; "Mummy kiss." Tonks leant towards her and kissed the other side of her face. Olivia stopped crying then, and her father gently sat her on the bed next to Teddy, Harry and Ginny.

"Be good, both of you."

"We will!" Harry and Ginny responded, laughing.

The restaurant Remus and Tonks had dinner at served exquisite seafood accompanied by soft classical music and illuminated by candlelight. Remus's senses were overwhelmed; there was the taste of the delicious fish, the mellow sound of violins and the ever beautiful smell of Tonks's perfume. She was wearing make-up tonight as well as perfume, a rare use of beauty products. She was beautiful without them, but tonight, she was perfect. Remembering the dreams he had had of her, it seemed almost unreal that it had been five years since they had married. She had been optimistic, he pessimistic...and of course, she had been right. Her hands reached for his as they waited for their bill.

"Shall we go to the beach?" she asked him. The candlelight made her glossed lips as well as her eyes sparkle. The thought of the sand, the sea, the new moon and her in one place was irresistible.

"Yes, but don't you want to have another drink?"

Her head moved towards his. "I didn't much feel like the pub." she said. "The local is having a quiz night, and as much as I love quizzes, I'd much rather be alone with you tonight. I've got a bottle of mead in my bag and two glasses, so we can head straight there."

Wine as well? It was too good to be true, or so he thought, until the bill arrived. She gave a disappointed sigh at his raised eyebrows.

"It's alright, we won't have to wash up. We're just...indulging ourselves a bit." he said, thinking of the last time they had gone out, only two months ago for her thirtieth birthday. It was a different kind of evening, as they had brought Teddy and Olivia with them, but the money was from the same budget. The holiday was also emptying their pockets. She, however, just rolled her eyes.

"When you publish your book, we'll make so much money we'll laugh at ourselves for getting so frantic over our little holidays in Blackpool. We only get one fifth wedding anniversary, you know."

His hands relaxed as hers caressed them, and he looked into her deep blue eyes as he had done the same day five years ago, when she had vowed to be his until the end of their days. He nodded, left enough cash for the meals and a decent tip, and they headed for the beach.

Tonks found them a perfect spot without much effort, and they reclined on it, removing their shoes and wiggling their toes in the soft sand. She placed her small, old shoulder bag between them and removed from it a tray, two wine glasses and a large bottle of French white mead. After she struggled with the corkscrew, he kindly took the bottle from her and poured them both a glass with far better co-ordination than she could have. They lifted their glasses in a toast.

"To our marriage." he said, happily.

"May we have at least fifty more years." she agreed, and they drank to that with deep satisfaction, then, placing their drinks back on the tray, shared a warm celebratory kiss. As they parted, she noticed his large amber eyes dart behind them to see if anyone was around, and her husband's modesty inspired an exciting thought in Tonks. She grabbed the sleeve of his old black suit jacket and grinned knowingly.

"Let's go for a paddle."

He looked towards the sea. "Won't it be cold?"

With a glance at the moonless sky and the smoothly flowing waves, she paused, and then said "Well, you can carry me."

And so, with a groan of mock reluctance, he lifted himself from his comfortable seat on the sand, rolled up his trouser legs, walked over to her and lifted her in his arms as he did when he carried her over their flat's threshold on their wedding night. She was heavier than she had been then, but he seemed not to notice. She felt his fingers tighten around her thighs as they rushed to the water's edge, and almost didn't notice when he swung her precariously.

"Don't you DARE drop me in there!"

He burst out laughing, and rushed forward as a wave met them, and sprayed her a little with water. She laughed with him, and he put her down with another kiss. They gripped hands and ran back and forth with the waves as their children had done that morning, twirling in and out of tight embraces, shrieking and squealing with cold and wetness, and above all, feeling an increasing sense of love and desire.

Eventually they staggered back to their tray and their shoes, their clothes heavy after being soaked almost up to the waist, still chuckling together. They lay next to each other-him on his back and her on her stomach-ignoring the sand clinging to their feet, and talked reminiscently.

"I wonder what we were doing this time five years ago?" he thought aloud.

"Well, it's got to be about ten o'clock, so I'd say this was about the time you were struggling with the back of my dress." she replied matter-of-factly, drawing a heart in the sand with her wand.

"It was a good night." he said, a smile spreading across his face.

"It was a _perfect_ night. We were married, we had a home, we were happy, and best of all...we made ourselves a baby."

Another good memory. Though Teddy had not been the best planned baby in the world, by the time of his arrival he was one of the most welcome. And now Harry, the very boy who was responsible for directing Remus back to his wife and child, was about to experience that himself. A wistful look had come over Tonks's face as she also remembered the birth of their son. Olivia's arrival had been just as wonderful, but Teddy had the additional merit of being unexpectedly healthy, as well as being born at a time of extreme stress and anxiety for both his parents.

"I love being a mother, you know, Remus..." she began.

"We _did _agree to stop at two." he said, before she could finish her sentence. "I'm getting too old."

She turned to him, raising her pink eyebrows. "We did agree to only have two, but not because you're too old, hubby dearest." Though the grey hair suggested otherwise, her optimism relaxed him as always. "...and I want you to show me tonight just how youthful you really are. It isn't just the anniversary of our wedding _day_, you know." she whispered seductively, leaning over him, her hand on his chest.

"We shan't be having _any more _'happy accidents'." he said with a light-hearted laugh, embracing her tightly. She threw her hair back in a youthful manner, then turned back to him.

"I wouldn't change our family for the world." she told him honestly, placing her head on his shoulder.

"No worries Dora, we'll never have to." he replied, putting his arms around her.


End file.
